When it came to choosing the food for her wedding reception, Abby (Hardwick) Clark says she was somewhat intimidated by all the choices and worried about satisfying her 240 guests.

But after a taste test of herb-crusted pork prepared by Conn's Catering of Springfield, Ill., she knew the meal would go over well with her guests.

"We knew it was sort of a nontraditional selection," says Clark, 25, of Chicago. "We just thought, 'It's so good. Let's go for it.'"

Clark's wedding was one of about 2.1 million that took place last year in the United States, according to the 2005 American Wedding study by the Fairchild Bridal Group, which publishes magazines such as Modern Bride, Brides and Elegant Bride.

The average cost of a formal wedding is more than $26,300 with $8,364 spent on the reception and $1,153 spent on the rehearsal dinner, the study shows. Catering a reception can be a large part of a bride's budget. From a traditional buffet style to a sit-down meal, brides have plenty of entree, appetizer and dessert items to choose from when it comes to serving their guests.

Despite the exotic items and elaborate presentations in many magazines, brides and grooms more often seek a traditional menu of chicken or beef, says Stacey Porter, a wedding consultant and owner of Savvy Expressions Wedding and Event Planning in Urbana, Ill.

Nelson's Catering in Springfield provides food for more than 100 weddings a year, says Sheila Brooks, Nelson's marketing director. The grilled items, which are Nelson's most popular, are marinated and then grilled on a 20-foot-long stainless steel grill.

The menu at about 80 percent of Nelson's weddings consists of grilled chicken breast, served with fresh pasta salad, garden salad, potatoes, rolls and drinks, Brooks says. The cost of the meal is $7.95 per person.

If the bride chooses to add a second entree, it's usually lasagna. This pushes the cost up to $10.35 per person.

About three-fourths of Nelson's clients choose a buffet-style meal. Customers can expect to spend between $1,500 and $2,000 on food when serving 100 to 150 guests, Brooks says. She added that her company's prices are mid-range.

Although most people choose a full dinner, "more often people are opting to do (just) hors d'oeuvres," Porter says.

Because of the increase in appetizer-only receptions, Brooks says, Nelson's created specific appetizer menus featuring chicken wings, egg rolls and meatballs, among other items.

Common hors d'oeuvres also include stuffed mushrooms, chicken strips and shrimp cocktails. Guests often munch on veggies and dip.

"Cheese and crackers are normally a standard," Porter says.

Yet brides looking for a cheaper way to feed their guests might not want to take an appetizer-only route.

Brides should allow for about eight to 10 servings of each appetizer, Brooks says. The more appetizers to choose from, the more expensive the food gets; Nelson's appetizers range from $6.80 to $12.50 per person.

"Those people who think that it's cheaper, it doesn't necessarily come through that way," Brooks says.

One way to control the number of appetizers is to have a butler serve them, says Court Conn, owner of Conn's Catering. With butler-passed appetizers, customers can limit their guests' intake to an hour as opposed to an appetizer buffet, which may be available longer.

Having appetizers served on silver platters by caterers wearing white gloves "gives a nice touch" to any wedding, Conn says.

Conn's Catering offers choices of hot hors d'oeuvres, such as smoked bacon-wrapped water chestnuts with a sweet orange glaze sauce, and cold hors d'oeuvres, such as sushi served with wasabi and pickled ginger.

But Conn says he sees chicken as the most commonly served meat because it is "safe"; brides don't have to worry about guests who don't eat red meat or pork. Conn's average cost per person for a served and plated meal is about $40. The cost of the facility, setup, cleanup, linens, glassware and other charges are factored into this average.

"Everybody has their own vision of how they want their day to be," Conn says. Despite the many choices a bride and groom face, Conn says he reminds them that "it's your day; serve what you want."

Brides are changing the way desserts are served, Conn says. Occasionally, guests are served individual cakes or are offered individual desserts.

"It used to be wedding cake at every single (wedding)," he says.

Patrick Groth, chef and owner of Incredibly Delicious agrees.

In addition to smaller cakes, Groth says, some brides serve desserts such as fruit tarts, hazelnut creme puffs or Key lime mousse in chocolate shells. Dessert prices range from $1.95 to $4.95 each.

Anything goes in terms of desserts, says Groth, who satisfies many a sweet tooth at more than 100 weddings each year.

The chef says small, square cakes with colorful sugar ribbons and sugar bows are just one of the trends he has seen.

Groth creates cakes with many flavor combinations, including lemon cakes with raspberry filling and strawberry cakes with white chocolate mousse filling.

Groth says many factors are considered when choosing desserts, such as the time of day the dessert will be served, whether the meal is sit-down or buffet and whether there will be alcohol at the wedding ("The more people drink, the less sweets they'll consume," he explains).

But, Groth says, "The primary factor is, what does the bride want?"

Clark advises brides to pick something they like and choose a menu as soon as it's convenient.

"Once it's down on paper, it's another thing that's off your plate."

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From falling cakes to fires, kids have caused all kinds of calamities at weddings.

Take, for example, the bride who smashed the top of her wedding cake because her son, who was rolling around on the floor, tripped her.

"Luckily, the bride had just cut the cake for pictures," said a witness, Bill Manos, a disc jockey. "When she fell, she put her hand down and smashed the top layer."

It wasn't pretty, Manos said, but at least it was her own child causing the disaster.

Peggy Chovan, owner of Johnnie's Pastry Shop in Massillon, Ohio, said she has seen many near-cake disasters over the years because "for whatever reason, kids like to rock the wedding cake."

Jean Chamberlain, manager of Santangelo Catering, remembers one wedding reception that started off in grand manner. "The two youngsters were about 8 years old. No one knew they were under the table, and when the bride and groom came through the line, the kids grabbed their legs and food flew everywhere."

As disastrous as it was, Chamberlain said, everyone, including the couple, laughed. She added that they try to keep children away from the buffet table so these things don't happen, but ... At another wedding Santangelo catered, the flower girl was changing her clothes for the reception and decided to run out in the middle of the party stark naked. She was 5.

IMITATION

At one wedding, Chamberlain said, a young boy witnessed the groom smashing cake into the bride's face. "As the couple made their way around the room, this boy smashed his plate of cake into the bride's face because he thought that was what he was supposed to do.

"We recently had a wedding that had candles on the table, and the kids sitting there set the table on fire," she said. "Then we had a wedding where the kids got on the floor, rolled on their backs, and started looking up the girls' dresses."

Kids crawling over pews in church, screaming flower girls, and ring bearers who refuse to walk down the aisle also have caused problems.

Patricia Varn, owner of Patricia's Floral and Plant Shop in Canton, Ohio, and a wedding consultant, said at one wedding the minister got upset when youngsters in the wedding party started crawling over the pews and running up and down the aisles of the church.

GIVE IT A REST

When children are asked to do too much before the wedding, they get tired and often start acting up, Varn said. She recalled a wedding where the photographer started shooting photos hours before the event.

"The photos started four hours before the wedding. The flower girl was so tired and hungry that when it was time for the wedding to start, she was done. She was crying and she didn't want to have any part of it."

At another wedding, the ring bearer refused to walk down the aisle.

"He just said, 'No,' threw the pillow down and that was that," she said. "When you ask a 2- or 3-year-old to do something, they get scared, and anything can happen because they don't know (any differently)."

PREVENTING DISASTERS

You can't foresee everything youngsters can do at a wedding, but you can lessen the chances of a major disaster. Experts have suggestions for couples to consider when planning a wedding involving children:

- Don't try to have someone too young handle too much. Children should be at least 5 to participate in the wedding ceremony.

- Children like to be the center of attention, so ask someone to pay special attention to them. Consider having someone walk the child down the aisle - a parent, grandparent, or another wedding party member. Also, ask someone to oversee the child's behavior so everything goes smoothly during the ceremony.

- Kids don't have much patience. When photos and other activities are done before the wedding, try to have youngsters participate at the last minute, rather than making them stand around the entire day.

- If you plan on having a child stand with you during the entire ceremony, seat a parent nearby where he or she can see them. The child might get restless and start acting up. Having the parent nearby gives the child an option to sit down. If the ceremony will be long, have the child walk down the aisle, then immediately sit with his or her parent.

- Set up a room or an area for children 10 and younger and keep them occupied with coloring, crafts, videos, etc. Ask an older child or adult to oversee the activities. A "goodie bag" at the reception for each child, with a coloring book and small box of crayons, will give them something to do and will be like getting a gift for good behavior.

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